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Why would a narcissist let you ignore him?In: Narcissism |
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Well, the abovementioned answers are very interesting. Having not given into the "N" in my life, he has disappeared. Out for new supply. I'm sure. But I'm also aware he'll be back. What's the best way to handle the next contact? Ignore? Or just slowly and carefully move away. Say, love to catch up but...or something like that? I feel ignoring them will hurt them but also enrage them and somewhat satisfy them. ie hah she's annoyed because...(they love that). So how to heal and get rid of them once and for all? It's hard for an intellegent women to overcome and move on from something like this. It works against our normal grain. How can this happen to me? I guess forgiving ourselves is key.
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He has another source of supply and doesn't need you as a source any longer (especially since you have become a source of narcissistic injury - negative supply).
There are many types of sources of narcissistic supply - females are only one of them. Career, material possessions, celebrity, friends, even pets - are ample sources of supply.
But I think that he has another female as a source of supply.
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As with any form of disengagement, with time you should both be learning independent ways to meet your needs.
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Narcissists are very difficult to "know" and to predict - unless you have spent the big part of your life studying them and their victims. That's precisely why they have a constant supply of victims - they are "not fully human" and thus not fully knowable.
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A narcissist would let you ignore them because they do not want you anymore-its hard for them to actually let go of you forver-expect a phonecall etc six months later-but act nonchalent-if you let on that you still may love them etc, then they know that they can use you when they feel like it. As a narcisstist myself, i had to to have at least 3 male admirirers all the time-the love and attention off only one man wasnt good enough for me, i ahd to have the assurance that i was desirable to all men. i find it tempting to text an old lover, to see how they are, even though i ruined their confidence-an im still trying to stop myself accepting that im being ignored. to be honest, ignorance is the best remedy against a narcissit. n-addict.
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To the narcassist women who posted here above. Just remember this okay...victims do move on and just because your a narcasisst does not mean that this man or men sit and think of you...my guess is they have found real women and long forgot all about you. I know your an Narcasisist and that is painfull for you to hear but its the truth. Victims dont think back fondly of these types of parasites. I hope you get professional help. Best Wishes. Many reasons. Could be he has found another victim. Could be he wants you to beg and is showing you that you ignoring him does not bother him. Remember these types are about control cause they know they are useless. Could be he is trying to figure out what would bother you and its working. Your bothered by him not being bothered by ignroing you. These losers love games. Have nothing to do with him.
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The remark above about how he could be hoping you beg him really resonates with my experience. Some of these people play a very hard game and are willing to wait, especially if they have some other source of supply currently going on. And according to Sam, they always have alternative sources ready. The new source may not be in your category; i.e., could be a new activity, and new lover of a different sexual orientation and therefore exciting (also dangerous), involvement in professional goals, etc. Maybe he wants you to be "on the shelf" but still available if/when he wants you. I understand that is often their behavior. Be alert and don't be surprised if he contacts you when you are not expecting it. Have your attitude ready and be primed to slide out of this thing again--he'll be even more hurtful and dangerous next time. Georgette
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hey i would just like to add an answer....
im only 22 years old&this is quite hard4 me 2 talk about as i am just gettin over this mess at present. For 9 months i let this person rule me he has ruined my life completely....whilst with him i would cry every day.... he tryed to control me and i think eventually got frustrated when there were things i just wouldnt do for him..... he found anything to argue about and hated to c me happy i would spend all day cheering myself up without him i'd see my friends etc.. then he'd make me miserable in seconds.. this is where the real mess began though......we would see less and less of eachova...i kicked him out i then forgave him stupidly& met up but i got up and left the place we were at he came back the next day and then left... didnt come back punished me for a futher week... he then got in touch but as i learnt with these people if u do not answer right away or if u question what they have just done they are off.... he then said he would never ever get back with me i did not get closure for a while i did nothing wrong....i got my reasons the only thing he could say was because you are never happy&you wouldnt do this&this......
First answer by Angela. Last edit by Hails. Contributor trust: 40 [recommend contributor]. Question popularity: 167 [recommend question]





