How can you learn good table manners?

Learning Good Table Manners:

• The host and hostess (giving the dinner) generally sit at each end of the table. In some cases if there are grandparents or great grandparents and depending on the culture they will sit at each end of the table.

• If the dinner is fancy and there will be soup, salad and a main course then the table should be set with dinner plate on bottom, salad plate on top of that and the soup bowl on top of the salad plate. Cutlery to each side of the plate with a napkin (sometimes people will put the napkin in the wine glass.)

• Don't start to eat until everyone is seated. Some people may say a prayer of thanks before eating and if you are a non believer at least bow your head. Don't simply just 'dig into the food!' The host and hostess are the ones that should pick up their knife and fork first to eat and everyone else follows suit.

• Place your napkin on your lap and DON'T tuck it into the top of your dress, blouse or shirt.

• If it's a fancy dinner then work from the outside in. Soup may be served first, then a salad and then the main course. When eating soup you cup the soup spoon (hollow side) away from you and scoop the soup up that way. No slurping! Then the smaller fork is used for the salad (and even perhaps a smaller knife depending on the salad.) The smaller knife is a 'butter knife' and can be used if buns are served. If the table is set properly there should be a separate plate for your bun. If there is no plate for the bun then putting the bun on your dinner plate is acceptable.

• If wine is served it's usually served from the right or, if it's a simple family dinner the bottle is passed along the table. If you don't like wine then just say so. Water glasses with ice water should also be placed at the top of the dinner/salad plates.

• Don't feel you have to eat everything that is given you. Say nothing, but pass the food (if not served by a maid) to the next person. If a maid or (if in a restaurant) a waiter/waitress is serving then just quietly say 'no thank you.' Don't take huge portions of food because you can always go back for seconds (if asked!)

• When you finish your main course cross your knife and fork diagonally ... across your plate .... side by side (this means you are finished.) If you aren't finished and would like more then place your knife and fork on the plate side by side. This is only used at wealthy banquets or at high end restaurants. When eating at someones home cross your knife and fork on the plate. The Hostess will usually ask if you would like another portion of everything and if you want to then do so.

• If eating with a family then offer to help clear the table or even do dishes.

• Be sure you thank the host and hostess for the delicious meal.

• The above detailed information on proper table manners or etiquette is superb!! Although may not be intentional, this question states "how can you learn...good table manners" How? Well, yes, you can learn from an excellent response as above, but hopefully, we learn the basics when we are children from our parents. Then, as we mature and need to learn more about fine dining and being a good hostess, we can research (WikiAnswers), read, and consult friends, relatives, and/or contacts.

• It is great information. Only one statement is mixed up: placing knife and fork side by side diagonally on plate means you are finished and placing them crossed on plate means you would like to get offered more food, not reversed. Also noteworthy: in Europe except Great Britain both hands need to be on the table, even if not in use. It is impolite not to do so. In North America and Great Britain the hand not in use remains under the table unless you are using a fork in your left to hold down the food you are cutting. The knife is then placed on top rim of plate, the fork is changed over to the right hand to pick up the cut bites. In Europe except Great Britain the cut food remains and is picked up with the fork in left hand, the knife is not dropped.
  

• If you are still confused you can purchase an etiquette book from your local bookstore.

• Good table manners are learned from one's parents or nanny. If they have failed in that duty then you should purchase a suitable book on the subject.

First answer by Marcy. Last edit by Tltfaas. Contributor trust: 35 [recommend contributor]. Question popularity: 40 [recommend question]